tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67280300311323868542024-03-06T00:02:16.801-05:00...that girl, Nicki DanielsNicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.comBlogger43125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-3725643078114720922010-03-25T01:37:00.000-04:002010-03-25T01:37:09.177-04:00Now That Thick Is In...So I should be studying for my Chem final tomorrow, but instead I'm over here marveling how crazy it is that in a matter of a few years, being thick has become a compliment vs. being an insulted.<br />
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I've always been on the skinny side with this need to gain weight (for myself, cause I think I'm too skinny and because the weight might make me voluptuous) and now I feel the need to gain weight moreso than ever. I feel as if everyone has an ass now and I'm among the few shaking my back to the music and contorting my body in pictures, to have that hourglass figure.<br />
Don't get me wrong, I have my curves, but not curves like I want. I'm not saying I want to be like Buffy the Body, cause that's just to much for someone as small as me...but I would like to whip out an outfit every once in a while and have people say, '<i>she's got a body on her'</i>.<br />
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Now with the rise of video vixens, Nicki Minaj, and those models on pesky party fliers that every party promoter throws your way as he talks you into coming to his event, as if he'll remember you once you get to the door, I feel as if we have become flooded with the images of these gloriously thick women, who aren't afraid to be thick. And there is most definitely nothing wrong with being thick, especially if your naturally thick.<br />
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I'm just surprised at the extent of underground modeling, which features thicker females vs. the magazine spreads of couture that feature more slender females. With the exception of the extremely famous thick vixens, such as Beyonce, gracing the cover of Vogue and Cosmo every once in a while, I'm just trying to figure out why thick isn't being pictured as classy.<br />
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Why does the thick girl always have to be wearing some sort of revealing clothing or lingerie??? Is it because if you have the curves, you might as well bare it all vs. if you don't you should cover up???<br />
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It's just some food for thought, considering being thick is the new movement and the thicker you are the better. And with this increased level of explicit sex songs taking over the airwaves, and don't tell me it's not explicit when just a few years ago everyone was singing about getting the girl to the bedroom, vs. now what he's doing in the bedroom. I'm just saying, it's getting a little harder to play a relatively new slow jam without feeling all hot and bothered. So, I only want to know if as these more thicker models make themselves known, if they'll ever be fully clothed modeling or will they have to remain half-naked???<br />
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Regardless of what happens, I'm still gonna try and get thick. I mean, it's only a matter of time before I'm gaining weight in all the right places.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-17996323942145902502010-03-24T19:26:00.000-04:002010-03-24T19:26:32.401-04:00Yet Again...Yet again, I return from my hiatus and marvel at how un-busy I was during those past months, weeks, days, that I haven't posted.<br />
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So, I'm back, yet again.<br />
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So what has happened in life? Absolutely nothing of great importance. I feel as if I've done a whole lot more partying over the course of this year, than I have any other year. I also feel as if I've allowed Twitter to dictate my life. I've been slacking off in school and now that I'm close to the semester being over, I'm worrying like crazy, but doing nothing proactive.<br />
I should be complaining about my life being in shambles, but I have this whole new outlook, if you can call it that. I simply don't care as much anymore. I'm more focused on connecting now with people, so I can have connections when I graduate versus ensuring that I have really good grades, not as if I'm not receiving them currently.<br />
As it stands right now, I'm looking up internships and summer jobs, and trying to get some business cards made up for myself. Why? I have no idea why, but it sounds like something I should do.<br />
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Currently however, I have one huge project that I've taken on...taking care of myself. So many people forget about taking care of themselves, and I don't want to be in that number. Now, I'm not saying that I need to hit the gym, do my hair, or keep myself looking good (I would like to think I'm already doing that), but I'm trying to take care of myself in regards to caring more about myself versus people.<br />
This does not mean, I'm about to turn into a self centered bitch...I'm just trying to focus more on myself and my own well being and mental and spiritual state, vs those of others. I've spent my whole life ensuring others were happy and forcing their happiness to be my happiness, not anymore. I'm taking control of my life and my decisions and doing things for me now, because I want to do them, not because someone told me to.<br />
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So with that said...I'm off to start this project.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-66807624344446963332010-01-24T12:33:00.000-05:002010-01-24T12:33:44.082-05:00Today is a Work DayI'm sitting here at work, patiently awaiting for someone to come downstairs and try to buy something.<br />
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Good news to all that attend the University of Hartford and hated the fact that the Hungry Hawk (the snack shop downstairs in GSU) didn't accept cash. Now it does!!<br />
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I'm also currently sitting here at work, not only questioning the lack of customers but the lack of free time in my schedule today. I'm working an 11-5 shift today and afterwards I have a meeting at 5:30 with my liturgical dance group, afterwards a staff meeting at 7pm and then fashion show practice at 7:30. I assume that I'll barely get to see my room today and furthermore will go without a nap. (Tragic, isn't it?)<br />
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So why is this blogging worthy?<br />
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Well for starters, because this is my blog and whatever I deem blog worthy is what will essentially be blog worthy. Second, why not start the rebirth of my blog with a bit of randomness about my life. Thirdly, that's all I've got.<br />
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So my dilemma is this, with so little time in between so many of these events, I'm going to starve to death. I know I'm very skinny and for the most part I don't eat at regular intervals, but when I'm hungry, I'm hungry and don't expect me to share. Also, being at work for such a devastating long time with absolutely nothing to do is going to drive me up the wall and make me go insane. There is only so much you can do at work with your laptop and phone before you get sick and tired of both and want something else to do.<br />
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It's such a shame that none of my friends will visit me during this time, simply because for the most part they're still knocked in their beds and won't begin to move until close to 2pm. Once they awake, they'll be sitting around complaining of hunger and awaiting to go the Commons for dinner, which isn't until 4:30pm. This leaves them with no opportunity to come and visit me. I mean, GSU is a trek from where we live on campus.<br />
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What makes it worse is that I don't have hubby to keep me fully entertained. Am the only one that loves talking to their significant other, but then enough is enough and you need someone else to talk to, otherwise you'd kill yourself from hearing him/her repeat their ideals and talk about their life?<br />
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What is also currently killing me is the conflicting noises come from a television that I can see and one that I can't. I mean honestly, either we're going to listen to sports or listen to music videos. Unfortunately we can't do both at the same time, it just doesn't work.<br />
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But we're on to the next one, which isn't exactly something to discuss, but rather a way to sign off on what is to become perhaps my most hectic day thus far, without truly being hectic.<br />
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So much time and no way to waste it all. Smh.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-35659351050457703362010-01-24T11:59:00.000-05:002010-01-24T11:59:56.250-05:00A Fresh Start...I figured this blog wasn't really going anywhere. I mean honestly, every so often I would mention something outside of my life but for the most part it focused on just that, my day and how I felt.<br />
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Blogging is a serious career now.<br />
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I'm not saying that from this point forward I'll be blogging strictly with the intent of business, but I would like for people that do read my blog to know what I'm talking about. I don't want them feeling like they've missed out or something or just can't keep up with my life. My life is pretty simple after all.<br />
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So what would I talk about? I couldn't even tell you. I get inspired quite easily but it doesn't happen often enough for me to just take time out of my day and blog. I wish it did, but I have to face reality and realize it doesn't.<br />
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I've been reading numerous articles online about blogging. Most of them say updating regularly is key, second to topic discussions, and blog design. My current blog design is no other of me all over it. Am I conceited? No, but what other way can I note this blog is a personal blog?<br />
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But I think I'm getting off topic. This blog is about me. It's about my thoughts, my opinions, my views, and my take on society and everything else around me. Of course it might show some things that I'm lusting over and it might have a heavy discussion every once in a while, but that's just a part of who I am. I'm mostly random and partially deep. But once again, I'm getting off topic.<br />
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So where do I go from now? How about trying to faithfully say true to this blog and then just allowing my mind to wonder and find something of intrigue or interest.<br />
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That sounds like a plan to me.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-11772052040683156212010-01-09T01:31:00.000-05:002010-01-09T01:31:40.168-05:00New Year and New Beginnings!!!At the start of every year, everyone makes resolutions of what they'll accomplish within the upcoming 12 months. Some people go on diets and others go on a self transformation mode. So, what were my new year resolutions?<br />
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I didn't have any.<br />
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Honestly, I didn't make any promises for myself for this year. Perhaps I should make the promise to be more faithful to this blog like I was in the past. But honestly, I have to say that December was a very hectic month. So much was going on that I honestly didn't have time to blog <shame me="" on="">.</shame><br />
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So what have I been up to lately?<br />
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Nothing.<br />
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Now you know that I haven't been up to much lately and I haven't made any new year resolutions. Honestly, I don't think I need a new beginning. I just think I need a better understanding.<br />
I strongly believe that understanding is what everyone is searching for when they make those promises to create a better them in the upcoming months. Honestly, you can't create a better self than the one you already are. It just doesn't happen. You just have to accept what you are and what your not. That's what I'm doing. I'm accepting what I am and what I'm not. I'm searching for understanding.<br />
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Other than that...I don't really have much to say. I promise I'll update more faithfully though. =]Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-84244785375218519782009-11-12T18:21:00.000-05:002009-11-12T18:21:10.486-05:00Black CultureI don't know why, but one minute I'm not doing much but rolling around in bed and the next thing I know I'm thinking about the Black Culture. Maybe it was because of the BSU meeting today where a professor came in and talked about one of the courses he's teaching in the spring about urban communities, making them better, designing them, and improving the area that we live in. Maybe that struck a chord, or maybe it was Gabby's (a.k.a my ex-wife. lol.) talk about professionalism and how we need to be more professional at our meetings inside of shouting over each other. She raised very good points that seem to combat all the reasons people tried to throw at her. But I started thinking to myself...<br />
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What happened to our Black Culture?<br />
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I kinda wish I could write a paper on this because I'm feeling all sorts of ways over it and it's really eating at me. I read a novel not to long ago that discussed the transition from generation to generation and the changing of the culture. The novel was entitled "Long Distance Life" by Marita Golden. I suggest you read it. But back to my question and my thoughts.<br />
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I feel like my generation and perhaps the one before it as well (thinking about the generation my older sister falls into) doesn't really care about our past and how far we've come as group. We never make a point to reference the struggle of those days unless it's during Black History month. The only struggle we ever make reference to is getting out of the ghetto and making money, which compared to the struggle of our grandparents isn't even a struggle. I feel like music and movies that feature, are directed by, and produced by Black people don't show how we're moving forward and continuing to make history. They all show us just accepting where we are at and not trying to go anywhere unless money is guaranteed in the process. Maybe that thought is wrong, but I feel like unless you wave the aspect of getting rich in front of someone in my generation they're not going to take any incentives to make a change.<br />
It scares me when I think about it in perspective to when we get older and I have children. What kind of world would I be bringing them into, where the people of my generation are just settling?<br />
Hip-hop music was designed to show that we had thoughts and opinions. It was a way of us letting the world know that we weren't stupid and unaware of what is going on. Now the music is all about who has the most money and fame, sex, violence, and drug. Occasionally you'll get the song about their struggle growing up, but nothing in their lyrics speaks much towards empowerment or how we should progress to become better than we are right now.<br />
Honestly, I believe if Barack Obama wasn't running for President, many people in my generation wouldn't even care or bothered to register to vote. They've forgotten just how much of an impact they can make simply because they think they don't have to because it was done already for them.<br />
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What happened to the Black Culture?<br />
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The Black Culture my parents grew up in, where they watched their parents experience racism, actual racism. Not this culture where my generation simply tosses the word around calling people racist because they say something they didn't like. Accusing people of racist tendencies if they are denied something. It's almost as if my generation is using excuses to get what they want and sadly some people are giving it to them for that main reason. No one wants to be called a racist in this time and age, and if you get called one, you'll do everything to have the person who said it to you take it back. That's what my generation is doing. They are forcing people to give them things they often times don't deserve just by calling them racist.<br />
We also don't have respect for each other. You can't have a culture unless you have respect and I feel like my generation has neither. We don't have respect for each other. We are constantly going after each other in one way or another. We are constantly trying to hold each other back from achieving things and labeling those of us that decide to achieve things. No one wants to be called uppity or bourgeois, yet that's the label given to us that want to have a better life and don't want to settle. No wonder some of us have taken on the label and kept it moving with our nose in the air and not a care in the world to what happens to those who gave us the label.<br />
I feel like my generation has lost respect for all that has come before them. It's sad, but in my mind it's also true.<br />
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I just want to know what happened to our Black Culture? Is it still around? Twenty years from now, will be ok with the fact that this is our culture?<br />
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I mean, I can say if it wasn't for the black culture we have now, our full figured women probably would never be recognized. Other than that, I can't see anything that my generation has done with our culture to make it a better one.<br />
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I think we're settling, forgetting, and disrespecting our rich heritage.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-87280969115248790762009-11-10T20:09:00.000-05:002009-11-10T20:09:08.689-05:00A Trip Down Memory Lane...<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Today I deleted my Myspace account.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">Traumatic? Not the slightest, but it did take down memory lane. I mean, I had to backup all my pictures because prior to my Facebook days of photo sharing, I was using my mother's laptop to store my pictures and upload them. Let's just say some things went bad with the laptop, so I backed up as much files from it as I could. Shortly afterwards, my little sister and my dad got into an argument over laptop usage and let's just say the laptop lost the battle.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">My current laptop is still a toddler. It turned one in like July and quite frankly, all my old photos never got restored on it. So today, I decided to do the dirty job of storing the ones I had on my Myspace on my laptop. This is what started my trip down memory lane and kinda made me squeamish at certain areas in thought.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">I mean, much of it reminded me of my senior year of high school. All memories of my ex (who I don't harbor resentment or anger at) and the people I thought I was close to and assumed were actually my friends. How quickly things change over the matter of years and a summer.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">I mean, my ex and I were pretty close, but things just faded away. Regardless of whether or not the rumors of what he supposedly said had anything to do with it, I don't know. I just know we aren't as close and we don't say much to each other. Ever. Well at least since the whole drama that went down this summer, which pretty much made us lose contact and aided in the creation of an war of sorts.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">As for the girl who I thought I was friends with. I just have to shake my head. The argument was truly uncalled for and so were the additional participants that got dragged into it, but at the same time I can't really say anything. I said my piece. I was mature about it. She wanted to call in reinforcement and thought she had it all in the bag, but pretty much it backfired in her face. So, I have nothing left to say about that situation.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;">But as I was saying...it just brought back all these memories. The good and the bad. The old and the recent.</span></span><br />
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</span></span>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-13144836867892065842009-11-08T16:26:00.001-05:002009-11-08T16:27:18.942-05:00Just Saw This and Now I Want It....<img height="320" src="http://photos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs057.snc3/14470_529464522365_67400164_31365642_2742879_n.jpg" width="267" /><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 15px;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;">[Double Breasted Wool Olga Coat...]</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 15px;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;"><br />
[LINK] </span></span><a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33915198" onmousedown="UntrustedLink.bootstrap($(this), "f07a024e1e03caeb4ebfb42661f29d65", event)" rel="nofollow" style="cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;">http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?lis</span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;"><wbr></wbr></span></span><span style="display: block; float: left; margin-left: -10px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;">ting_id=33915198</span></span></a></span>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-24313885218943996472009-11-08T12:22:00.002-05:002009-11-08T12:52:15.226-05:00My Nails...I mentioned I didn't like my nails, but I never showed you what they looked like. So here it is:<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://s3.amazonaws.com/twitpic/photos/large/41606967.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0ZRYP5X5F6FSMBCCSE82&Expires=1257703488&Signature=qKvLkXtJC7Nvk3UT7ndRXI7vPks%3D" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="256" src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/twitpic/photos/large/41606967.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0ZRYP5X5F6FSMBCCSE82&Expires=1257703488&Signature=qKvLkXtJC7Nvk3UT7ndRXI7vPks%3D" width="320" /></a><br />
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I guess the reason I don't like it is because I don't have a steady hand and doing acrylic on your own hand is extremely hard to do, especially when you want it to look right and this clearly didn't look right. The only reason for the black lines on the white tips is because I messed up the acrylic on one hand and had to do something to make it less obvious. So I did that and in the begin it turned out nice, but then when I switched hands to do it on, it started to look like crap, so I had to make the first hand slightly crappy as well so it'd balance out.<br />
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But, I think the lesson learned here is that I shouldn't do my own nails or I should spend more time doing them so I can perfect the art of doing it myself. Either way, this nail thing has to last until Thanksgiving break.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-89702629966866470912009-11-08T12:17:00.000-05:002009-11-08T12:17:04.983-05:00Def just made my day!So I was on Twitter and saw this Twitpic:<br />
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<img alt="Just Finished fitting @TheYBF for a Mag shoot on Monday! Only 12 of these were released in America! " height="180" src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/twitpic/photos/large/41507580.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0ZRYP5X5F6FSMBCCSE82&Expires=1257701391&Signature=UpPhkJXh7r29LnG0qJDtVRGhdFE%3D" width="320" /><br />
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I immediately thought to myself, WOW. Those are some cute shoes, but sadly the caption underneath told me everything I needed to know as to why I wouldn't be able to get a pair.<br />
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"<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-size: 16px; line-height: 16px;">Just Finished fitting @TheYBF for a Mag shoot on Monday! Only 12 of these were released in America!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 16px;"><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 16px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; line-height: normal;">If that isn't fair, I don't know what is. But I decided to make an attempt to follow the person who clearly wore this and devoted much of their Twitpics to shoes upon fashion to accessories. I really think you might enjoy their Twitpics as much as I have, so here's the link to their official Twitpic page.</span></span></span><br />
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Link Here: <a href="http://twitpic.com/photos/jason_rembert">Jason Rembert</a>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-29416756110360932792009-11-08T12:09:00.000-05:002009-11-08T12:09:38.694-05:00Yet another uneventful weekend...So I'm coming to the conclusion that my weekends are becoming increasingly dull and uneventful. This weekend, all of that has to change. HAS TO!!!<br />
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Well, this weekend will be my 10 month anniversary with my boyfriend and hopefully (cross my fingers) he'll come and spend the day with me. Honestly, we wouldn't have to do anything, that would be enough excitement for the week for me to call it eventful.<br />
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Yesterday was quite uneventful. The only truly exciting thing and that wasn't even all that uneventful was meeting "Stranger." He's a junior at Trinity (a local CT college in the area) and was on my campus yesterday, at my place of work, because he was hungry and had a meeting upstairs with the brothers of his fraternity. (I completely forgot the name of it, sorry.) Basically, he helped me pass an hour, approximately, of work down here. We talked about the part of NY we were both from (he's from Brooklyn, go figure). He told me that Queens was wack, but said the fact that I lived in Jamaica, Queens made it slightly better.<br />
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Let's just say we held a decent conversation, before he decided that he should go back to his meeting. His meeting lasted over 4 hours. How do I know this? My work shift is 5 hours. His meeting started an hour after I started work and I left work before he left his meeting. Makes me curious as to what a fraternity needs to have meeting about for that long.<br />
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Other than that, I actually got to work yesterday. Surprisingly people were around and were buying things. Most of them were from a sorority, I'm going to assume Delta Gamma considering that is what my roommate is pledging and they all seemed to come down here shortly after she went back upstairs with some girl.<br />
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My night continued on with me doing my nails (which I detest) and my laundry. I didn't have enough to dry both loads so I stuck both loads in the dryer and my clothes were still wet when they came out. Needless to say my room looked a hot mess with my clothes sprawled everywhere.<br />
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<img alt="Didn't have enough money for the dryer so I did this" height="256" src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/twitpic/photos/large/41447909.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=0ZRYP5X5F6FSMBCCSE82&Expires=1257700751&Signature=48UIv4dDjBOi%2BA0L%2FVxOk6uVjsw%3D" width="320" /><br />
(My clothes all over my bed, in an attempt to dry.)<br />
<br />
But, Peter came back to visit us. That made the night exciting, but he left to go to a party and left the rest of us in the dorm with nothing but each other's company and music. Heard some good ol' throwback joints though. Had Ja Rule on blast, lol. I drank the little of my Long Island Ice Tea, that I had left (there is still some in the bottle) and decided to call it a night cause nothing exciting was occurring.<br />
<br />
That was last night.<br />
<br />
Today, the final night of the weekend, I have doubts that things can recover and get better. It's already noon and I'm at work. Only one person has came to buy something here. No one has made a guest appearance and held a conversation with me. And I have to clean my room when I get back and do my homework. I highly doubt there will be an last minute parties going on with everyone gearing up for classes tomorrow and getting there homework done tonight.<br />
<br />
I guess I should keep hope alive, but I think I'm more excited about the fact that my shoes will be arriving this week, I will get paid, and it's my anniversary weekend.<br />
<br />
Here's keeping the hope alive.<br />
<br />
<img src="http://www.pittsfordpediatricdentistry.com/images/black_girl_thumbs_up2.jpg" />Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-30571568172979629512009-11-06T19:28:00.000-05:002009-11-06T19:28:28.989-05:00Finesse Have SHIPPED!!!So remember those pair of shoes I ordered from ShoeDazzle.com, well they shipped today via FedEx, so I take it they should be here by Wednesday the latest. I'm so excited.<br />
<br />
So if you weren't aware of my ranting and raving about ShoeDazzle.com, I'm gonna have to ask you to look through the older posts in the blog, because it's too much to recount in this post. But, I did want to say this one little fact.<br />
<br />
ShoeDazzle memberships is not $39 a month. It is actually $39.95 a month.<br />
<br />
I checked my account earlier this morning and made this little discovery. So, I'm practically paying $40 a month for a pair of shoes. Some may think that's too much money, but I don't think it is. The way I look at it is like this. I have to learn about balancing my checkbook and what better way to do so than with a monthly subscription to shoes. It'll show me what it's like in the real world when I have to pay for my cell phone, house phone, internet, and cable. (I don't pay my own cell phone bill, I know, I'm lucky.)<br />
<br />
But just so everyone can see the shoes that I decided to order here they are:<br />
<img alt="003-000015-0100" src="https://e1h7.simplecdn.net/shoedazzle/images/shoes/FINESSE_BLACK_side_sm.jpg" /> Finesse<br />
<br />
I just naturally liked them to be completely honest and now I can't wait to check my mail and get them next weekend.<br />
<br />
I have a really good feeling next week is going to be a good one and nothing like the horrible week I just endured. Day and last night was proof that things are definitely starting to look up for me.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-83097189299850071472009-11-05T09:55:00.000-05:002009-11-05T09:55:02.814-05:00Annoyed<img alt="oibabycc[1]" src="http://blogs.technet.com/blogfiles/tarpara/WindowsLiveWriter/VistaDesktopSearchAnnoyance_F561/oibabycc%5B1%5D_thumb.jpg" /><br />
<br />
That's how I feel right now. Annoyed. Upset. Outraged. Angry. Frustrated. And all other words that sum up the emotion in that picture.<br />
<br />
It's official that I've been dealing with the worse week of my life. Nothing has proven to go right just yet and it's frustrating me. I still need to go my dean and get him to sign this paper for a class I'm taking that I was registered for and apparently no longer am registered for, so I can get my credits and grade at the end of the semester.<br />
I'm also waiting for my SS so I can submit it to Human Resources and finally get paid. I'm in dire need of cash and my cash flow has startling dwindled. Yet, my campus mailbox reveals no letter from my mother alerting me that I have this item.<br />
Secondly, I got my recommendation from ShoeDazzle, picked my shoe, and it hasn't arrived yet. I wonder if I was living at my house if the shoes would have arrived already or if I'm just really bad at estimating the time that these things are shipped and length of time they take to arrive. Either way, it has made me extremely agitated.<br />
<br />
My breakfast didn't even help to cheer me up and to make matters worse, some uninvited guest is sitting across from me in the God forsaken GSU in an area I thought I had marked off from intrusion.<br />
<br />
So, if you couldn't tell before, now you can see why I'm so annoyed.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-39437650023334933292009-11-04T21:30:00.000-05:002009-11-04T21:30:48.579-05:00HBOImagine.comAlright, I'm pretty sure we've all seen the ads on HBO for this new Imagine thing they have going on and are currently busy promoting. (Or maybe it's because HBO is the channel in my dorm that the TV stays on). Let me just say, I give it thumbs up. It's freaking genius.<br />
<br />
Ok, the whole point of the campaign is to show that there is more than one side to every story and to know every side you have to see it from every angle, so it makes a point to do just that. I must warn you that everything is interconnected and you have to go through everything in the web before you'll ever be able to figure it out. And if you still don't get it, when you click at the bottom of the screen, it'll guide you through the story so it all makes sense at the end.<br />
Let me just say this...IT'S CRAZY!!!!!!<br />
There are so many twists and turns that you wouldn't have even seen, but you have to be patient if you want to get the whole story and REALLY know what's going on. But it is most definitely something worth checking out and I am so freakin' happy that I did. It most definitely made my night and now has me questioning the big film producers of my time. Why haven't they thought of this before?<br />
Another incredibly exciting part about this is that it's open the public, meaning they want young film directors to make their own versions. A challenge that can prove who has real talent directing and writing versus who doesn't. To get all the details you have to go the website, but trust me you won't waste your time. It's truly worth it.<br />
<br />
Let me just say, you're in for one hell of a surprise and if you didn't know it before, <i>It's more than you imagined.</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
Link Here: <a href="http://www.hboimagine.com/">HBO Imagine</a>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-34904380803026776032009-11-04T20:08:00.000-05:002009-11-04T20:08:03.534-05:00So It's Been A While...I apologize for my lack of blogging. It has most definitely been a while and once again, I have to apologize for that.<br />
<br />
I figured I should bring everyone up-to-date with the happenings of my life and quite frankly, I didn't do shit for Halloween, I didn't want to deal with all the drunk people on campus causing a scene. My boyfriend spent the weekend with me and he left today to return to NY. (I'm wearing a sad face in case you couldn't hear my disappointed). I have come to the conclusion that my roommate is just plain shady.<br />
<br />
Now before you start hitting me with the, she's white, give her a break, it's not easy to be living with a bunch of black girls, I have to say RACE DOESN'T HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH IT. Honestly, I know shady and she's been acting very shady and she's starting to push buttons that no one should be pushing.<br />
Can someone please explain to me her constant need to lie? Yesterday, I had to leave our room cause she needed complete silence as she had a phone interview, which sounded a hell a lot like yelling at her mother from where I was sitting at in the living room. Next, I was playing music today and she asked me if I could turn it off cause she had to make a phone call. I said sure and stepped out the room momentarily. No phone call was ever made.<br />
I seriously can't live with someone who won't allow me to play my music. That's just ridiculous. But it's also besides the point. My other reasons for believing this girl is just downright shady for no apparent reason.<br />
She never pulls her weight around her, unless it's removing the things we have carefully placed in the apartment for our comfort (i.e. the curtains, the seat covers). If she didn't like them, that's all she had to say. She waits until no one is around before she removes all of them. Secondly, her behavior last night was completely uncalled for. Chick did not need to be slamming things around and stomping while people are trying to be sleeping. My boyfriend said it was because she thought he would have left already rather than spend another night. Honestly, her behavior was uncalled for. But, I guess I should have picked up the fact that she was tired of him being here considering how she kept asking if he left when he was just in another room.<br />
Can someone say childish?<br />
<br />
But, I'm I have other issues as well, such as the jackass that is my boss.<br />
I just have one question for you, does it make sense to work a 10am shift if no one gets there to open up until 11:30am? I don't think it is, but apparently my boss does and has me working this shift. So I'm stuck dragging my ass over there at 10 in the morning to walk back to my room for 11:30. And then, he doesn't even know how to talk to people without being a jerk.<br />
Seriously, if you don't train someone how are they suppose to know how to do a void? In his words of explanation, "I'm driving, just keep hitting the void button something should happen". Just to let you know, nothing happened and I was quite screwed. Oh and so the mere fact that I have been working with Human Resources about getting my paychecks, being information isn't correct and him telling me if I didn't get it straightened out that I need to look for another job, just pissed me off more. Seriously? As if I don't want to get paid.<br />
Honestly, I've had it up to here and I can't take much more of the stress he's giving me. As if I don't have so many other things to juggle as well, and the fact that I apparently wasn't registered for one of my classes and now have to get these forms signed to have it re-added to my schedule just blew me off the edge.<br />
<br />
It's quite safe to say that my weekend/week was a pretty bad one considering what occurred. But as my boyfriend has quite clearly told me, I just have to keep moving because no one is gonna jump in and help me out. No one is ever that nice.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-30730503831989896142009-10-30T19:53:00.001-04:002009-10-30T19:56:24.150-04:00ShoeDazzle!!!I LOVE SHOES!!!!<br />
<br />
When I discovered ShoeDazzle, I had to throughly check it out and to be completely honest, since I've come across it I can't but want to be a part of this premier Shoe Society. So I'm beginning my membership and I'll be sure to let you know how that goes for me.<br />
The best part of this is that all the shoes are $39 a month. Which means, you're basically purchasing a pair of shoes for $39 dollars once a month. I don't think I'll ever need to go shoe shopping anymore now that I've established my membership. It's not a shoe rental either, so you get to keep these shoes. I can't even begin to explain my excitement about this.<br />
<br />
But I do think that all shoe lovers should check this website out if not join. I mean, the way I see it, you can't go wrong.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://e1h7.simplecdn.net/shoedazzle/images/home_v5.jpg?1256804106" imageanchor="1"><img alt="Fabulous - Join the World's Premier Shoe Society" border="0" height="172" src="http://e1h7.simplecdn.net/shoedazzle/images/home_v5.jpg?1256804106" width="320" /></a><br />
<br />
Link Here: <a href="http://www.shoedazzle.com/home">ShoeDazzle!</a>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-37361490869112173462009-10-30T13:39:00.000-04:002009-10-30T13:39:55.207-04:00Another Day Another Matter...So I should be happy today because my mom just put some money in my account that was much needed. She's also sending out some things for me so I can finally get my paycheck from work. (I haven't gotten like two I assume cause I didn't have all my information together.)<br />
<br />
So I should be rejoicing, right? Well I'm not.<br />
<br />
I thought maybe I need a pick me upper, so I got dressed, threw on my favorite lipgloss on, the one I only wear when going go, threw on some leggings, which I don't wear often, a simple blue shirt, and earrings that I reserve for going out. Figured that would help lift my spirits, but it didn't. So I proceeded to stuffing my belly. (I mean, that usually works,) but it didn't.<br />
<br />
To prove to you just how out of it I am, I washed my dishes, removed my trash from the room (didn't dispose of it outside though, but I will eventually.) made my bed, put away my clothes that I haven't put away in almost a week, and then plopped down on my bed and began to write this post. (Not that I only post new items to my blog when I'm depressed.)<br />
<br />
Either way you choose to explain it, I'm just not feeling like myself. I don't know if it has to do with my dream or the way my boyfriend has been acting lately. I couldn't tell you which one it is, but whichever one it is, it has me all screwed up inside and listening to Beyonce's "Broken-hearted Girl" among some other title tracks about possible heartbreak.<br />
<br />
Situation #1: The Boyfriend<br />
Lately he hasn't been himself. He blames it on his home situation where him and his mom are at wits end with each other. He also blames it on the physical distance between us (him in ny, me in ct). He just wants me to be around him and with him and to never leave his side. I want to be with him too, but I don't know what I can possibly do to make him feel better. I feel like instead of moving forward, we're taking steps back to where we were at once upon a time. A time where I wasn't as sure of our relationship as I am now, but know my concerns are different. I feel like he's not telling me something, like he's leaving out some crucial detail that can help pull his story together and get me where I need to be to be able to help him through this.<br />
<br />
Situation #2: The Dream<br />
This is a strange one, so listen/read carefully so you don't get confused and I'll try not to confuse you as well. Basically, it's about the Facebook revolution that has caused everyone in my family to go out and reunite with each other over the internet. So, we're suppose to go out, my mom and me, but one of these long lost relatives who I don't know all that well (or at all for that matter) comes inside the house and asks me what is taking me so long to get ready. Apparently everyone is going out and I'm holding everyone up because I'm the only one in the house. I tell her that my mother has told me that I'm always hungry and I should grab something to eat to walk with. Magically out appears this woman's son, who is my cousin (don't ask how I made that connection) and who is also gay. But not gay as in he looks it. He is legit gay and he doesn't look remotely gay. Suddenly I'm in my dorm room and the room is changed around a bit, in regards to closets, shelves, and desks, but either way it looks kinda different, but I'm able to recognize it as my dorm. My boyfriend is there and I guess you could say we're all cuddly like normal, expect that my roommate isn't my roommate anymore, it's his ex. For some strange reason though, I don't feel uncomfortable about the situation, her being there and seeing us like this. So, my boyfriend gets up from where he is on the bed with me and hands her this fish aquarium thing in a semi-bag and plastic bowl. She tosses it on her bed carelessly and he tells her it could break and that he plans on getting her something for some upcoming event of hers (a holiday, birthday, I honestly can't remember). She asks him what and he said that she can't expect him to tell her while his girlfriend (me) is in the room. At the sound of that, I excuse myself from the room, but keep close enough to the corner to try and hear what he tells her, but I don't because he's taking us to the movies, my cousin included. When we get the movie theater, which is the same one we went to in reality with the expect that we went another way to get there, we all get out the car to leave. I keep telling everyone my cousin is gay and now I'm not so sure if he is or if I just want him to be so my boyfriend's ex won't get any ideas. Anyway, so we sneak into the movie theater which apparently has a collection of glass doors that either lead you directly to the place where you have to pay or inside the theater itself. We decide not to pay (hence the sneaking) and go in through the side glass doors. This guy is banging on the door next to ours because apparently he was sitting in the balcony and he didn't have good seats. We figured this would be our excuse to if anyone asked what we are doing. We pass the concession stand and I ask for popcorn and my boyfriend buys some for me and we proceed to wandering around the theater, and then I wake up.<br />
<br />
I know the dream is a bit confusing and I'm sorry. I just woke up from that feeling very uncertain about some things. Can you blame me? Or do you blame me for feeling some type of way and not knowing why? Either way, I'm not feeling like myself now and I'm worried and very concerned.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-47985473096536974812009-10-28T22:34:00.001-04:002009-10-28T22:39:46.593-04:00Making My Day a Better One...<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">I decided that I wasn't going to let all the rain, cold weather, and gloominess of the day deter me from having a good day.</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Did I succeed??? Well that all depends how you measure success and what qualifies as having a good day.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">For starters, I went to all of my classes, even though the urge to remain in bed and the gloomy weather tried to deter me from my academic goals. So I went to both classes and surprise surprise, my first class gets out early. The downside to this was that I had class right after it and naturally, I wasn't paying attention to time so I darted out of class like I always do to get to it since it's on the other side of campus. I had to wait a whole 20 minutes before anyone decided to show up. Not to mention the class seemed to drag on for hours and every question my professor asked required the pulling of teeth to get a response.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">So where is the bright side to this? During my moments of waiting for class to begin I managed to stumble across this picture on my cell:</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJiVJbwITHDjBN1c695SDDYG5S85e4__O5m2WBKuZTE_gaLg-8oTwPtbe7vEeLaF41Flss0eTP7c44YT5HWpU9qnQwY86lkSrLW9yoKyFyr0N56ubWEDYQFWNY8CuLNwwTcVG0373b1vU/s1600-h/112057005.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJiVJbwITHDjBN1c695SDDYG5S85e4__O5m2WBKuZTE_gaLg-8oTwPtbe7vEeLaF41Flss0eTP7c44YT5HWpU9qnQwY86lkSrLW9yoKyFyr0N56ubWEDYQFWNY8CuLNwwTcVG0373b1vU/s320/112057005.jpg" /></a><br />
</div><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">These are the flowers my boyfriend had bought me over the summer. Of course they aren't the traditional red roses, but that's why I loved them. They were unique and just brightened up the room. Looking at them during those moments waiting for class to begin as it rained outside, made me happy. Suddenly, my day was going great again and I was smiling.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">After class I returned to my room and decided to do my nails. That made me feel pretty ok too. I was giving myself the pampering that I've neglected to do in the past month. I always manage to forget about pampering myself. So I commenced with doing my nails and decided, why not do acrylic. I mean, I know how to do it, I now possess the tools, why not try doing it on my own hand.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Buffing, sizing, and gluing the tips were no problem. Cutting them down and filing them, once again no problem. Reapplying glue where the tip and nail met and then buffing it smooth, no problem. Applying the acrylic and buffing it after it tried to smoothness, a big problem.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">For starters, I didn't check my brush and it was stiff. Needless to say the acrylic was all messy and didn't do it's job. So I tried it again. I cleaned the brush and worked it in my fingers so it wouldn't be as stiff. Success. Reapplying the acrylic, no success. Let me just explain by saying, I'm not good at applying nail polish to my own nails. It get it all over my fingers and cuticles. Now imagine the acrylic. This hard drying substance all over my fingers and nails. A huge mess. I'm still removing acrylic and let me tell you acrylic isn't the easiest thing to remove. Also, I didn't coat my nails evenly with the acrylic so parts of it had a lot and some not so much (the agony of clear acrylic that you can't really see as you spread it). So after all those trials, I got tired and was getting sick from the smell so I decided to call it a day, buff it and apply clear nail polish.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">Guess what happened as I buffed? The parts of my nail that didn't have enough acrylic on that buffed right off. I didn't own any clear nail polish so I had to borrow some of Reme's and that didn't go so well either. Although I won't complain, seeing as I borrowed it without asking, but it was sticking and not coating my nails well.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">So what did I do?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">I looked at the clock, realized that it was about 7:10 and panicked. I had to be at GSU for 7:30. So I decided to screw my nails, I'll finish them some other time and stuffed my heels into my bag, grabbed my keys and umbrella, threw my jacket on and rushed out the door.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">So where is the brightness to this?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">I'M IN THE FASHION SHOW AS A MODEL!!!!!!!</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">And my night just got even better at the realization that BEST FRIEND a.k.a Jon shouted me out on the radio as just that, BEST FRIEND!!!! And I ordered Chinese food and am now fully sastified.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">But as we all know, when things go up they must go down and the same has occurred tonight. I spent $10 of the $15 I had, which means I only have $5 left for this weekend to spend on alcohol with Reme. But hopefully this downside will become a good side once the weekend officially begins. A few drinks always brings out the best comedies in us.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">*note: I am not an alchy. lol.</span></span>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-87691971887735395472009-10-27T21:59:00.002-04:002009-10-27T22:06:17.595-04:00#whatmakesmesadOh twitter...you have disrupted our life the way facebook had done a few years prior. You have become increasingly significant in filling us in on the gossip and letting us air our dirty laundry, allowing wondering minds to know everything about us. Oh twitter...how wonderful you are.<br />
<br />
While my sentiments might appear that I hate twitter, I have to admit I'm addicted to it. At first everyone thought that Myspace was this big corruption tool, allowing others to peer into our lives, see our photos, and now every detail about our every move. Then Facebook came along and it was increasingly detrimental because now we really knew who everyone was. There was no need for alias, Facebook prided itself on that, even though some of us can't let go of Myspace days and feel the need to throw in an alias as their middle name. No twitter has proven itself to be the most detrimental.<br />
Twitter is like the best of both worlds, in a sense.<br />
You can maintain your alias, but it doesn't take much to find out who the person actually is. We have a picture to identify the person with and when you look at their profile, in the top corner is there name. (People can go really Myspace and fabricate one, but most people don't). Twitter is even more amazing since celebrities all over are tweeting. So now the realms of what was once private and a guessing game for the mind no longer exists.<br />
Celebrities post their every move and thought, regular people post their every move and thought, and now we have entered the world of no return. To make matters worst, you can even have your tweets tracked, so people can find out where they came from. How crazy is that in the post days of being told as a child not to give out any of your information to strangers?<br />
Now, that's not the only crazy thing about the twitter, but I believe there is no age limit on who can join (as if that ever stopped those underage).*<br />
Twitter, as I was saying before, is truly the best of both worlds. We can send each other private messages, known as direct messages, we can hold conversations with each other and leave public messages, called replies, we can encourage people to engage with each other on a topic, referred to as trending topics, we can post what someone else wrote, acknowledged as retweeting (RT) and soo much more.<br />
<br />
Now, before I continue...I AM NOT BASHING TWITTER. As I think I stated before, I'm an avid user. I really enjoy the challenge of expressing myself in 140 characters or less. I enjoy reading about what other people are doing or thinking. And I enjoy being able to read convos and thoughts that were once upon a time off limits to me.<br />
I'm just worried about the consequences of all of this.<br />
If you think about it, nothing is private anymore. No thoughts, actions, or opinions. But at the same time, I guess it's a good thing. If it wasn't for trending topics, I'm pretty sure most of us who don't watch the news would be so active participants in discussing our opinions on it, even if some of those opinions are those of complete ignorance.<br />
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So, I guess my point is...what will we come up with next?<br />
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*note: I can't remember if Twitter has an age requirement for users, so don't take my word on that part, but I think my point is clear.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-28876846951484006222009-10-26T22:38:00.001-04:002009-10-26T22:39:27.103-04:00Self-Esteem Not Self-DiscoveryI feel like the minute people enter college they go running off trying to reinvent themselves, discover who they are, rather than enhancing the person they already are.<br />
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I really can't say much about that group of people because a mere few months ago I was member of that group. I was trying to find myself, reinvent myself, when in reality no reinventing needed to be done. I just needed to be myself and the only way I could do that was to build up my self-esteem.<br />
For a while, I thought my alter ego was the person I wanted to be, but I honestly don't. I figured if I made a name for myself among my peers, I'd be something, but I was wrong. My peers are going to name me what they want regardless of whether or not I want them to. I just need to build up my self-esteem and exude confidence to be who I am and not who I think I should be.<br />
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That's all I have to say on the topic really for the moment. Maybe there will be later posts on this, but right now. This is it.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-76009896881118424272009-10-26T18:17:00.000-04:002009-10-26T18:17:44.267-04:00Fashion Try OutsSo yesterday, I tried out for my campus's Fashion Show. It's one of the biggest events hosted on campus and is also hosted by BSU (Brothers and Sisters United a.k.a The Black Club). If that doesn't make me proud, I don't know what will. Anyway, I've been dying since last year to hop on board with the whole Fashion Show thing, but I have natural inclination to want to do big things, but back out cause I don't have the self-esteem. (I think I've found my motif for the year)<br />
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So last night I tried out. I put on my Guess Suede ankle boots and strutted my stuff in the student union to this year's Fashion Show coordinators. Naturally, I messed up my spins, which they taught us to do, but overall I think I had the confidence to pull it off and to prove them that they wanted me to do their set. Either way, I was feeling pretty good until the actual audition came. I think my walk got weak and I stumbled a bit more on the spins that I had perfected minutes ago when they had me teach some other girl them.<br />
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But, I decided to leave last night with my head high and to not think about any negatives. Hopefully I'll get picked and if I don't, there is always next year, although not getting picked might be reason for me to not try out next year, but whatever.<br />
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I think I did well and that's all that counts.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-35882580057473462022009-10-26T18:10:00.001-04:002009-10-30T19:57:15.037-04:00Something that made my day...Now, I found this article a few days ago and I was meaning to put it up since Saturday, but as always, time slipped away from me, so I'll post it now.<br />
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<img alt="women evolving, future" src="http://www.blogcdn.com/www.lemondrop.com/media/2009/10/future-woman-flickr-284-102109.jpg" /><br />
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Link Here: <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial; font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/10/22/woman-of-the-future-is-shorter-fatter/?icid=main|main|dl3|link4|http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/10/22/woman-of-the-future-is-shorter-fatter/" style="color: blue; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: underline;" target="_blank">Women Of the Future Shorter and Fatter</a></span>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-49486124100403876582009-10-25T20:42:00.000-04:002009-10-25T20:42:29.718-04:00Some of the Craziest DreamsFor as long as I can remember, my friend and I always talked about how psychic my dreams are. This does not mean that all my dreams come true, because I do have some pretty out there dreams that I know for a fact will probably never come true, but for the longest I've been trying to decipher my dreams.<br />
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As I was taking a nap today, I had quite the dream, that got me thinking. I mean, I love my boyfriend, but there is still that question in my mind about whether or not if a certain person stepped up to the plate if I would even be dating my boyfriend right now. But, now to the dream:<br />
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I'm pretty much on campus and I'm walking around and out of nowhere Don* comes up to me and starts taking me somewhere. I'm not worried, because I pretty much know where he'd be taking me, but I'm a little surprised.<br />
From what I recall (that is not from dreamer's road) is that he has a girlfriend on campus and there's another girl he has more interest in than me. I was merely one of the first girls he meet on campus.<br />
We're just walking around the campus together as people we know and some that I don't know, who he apparently does, shout out to him and talk to him. I'm being pretty quiet because I'm trying to figure out what brought this on. Never in a million years would I have imagined him doing something like that.<br />
Before long, we're laying on the cement. Don't ask me how we got there, but either way, we're both laying down on it and he's kissing my neck and squeezing my leg, and needless to say I'm getting very hot. But I guess you can say reality strikes in the dream and I start thinking about his girlfriend and that girl he supposedly really likes that I'm friends with. You would think I'd think about my relationship, but I don't. Basically, I push him off of me (which was really hard to do both physically, mentally, and emotionally) and ask him why he's doing this. I question his faithfulness to his girlfriend, ask about my friend, and then try to figure out why all this attention for me? I mean, just last semester he wasn't really talking to me. Either way, he doesn't have an answer and I'm <span class="Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: line-through;">kinda upset</span> infuriated. I want him to say that this all a joke, that he really wanted me, but he doesn't. So now I'm sitting on the ground looking at him, trying to figure out why I'm his last resort choice, the girl he goes to when he can't go to anyone else, and feel used and abused.<br />
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Then I woke up.<br />
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Just thinking about the dream has me feeling some type of way about a person I shouldn't be feeling any type of way over. I thought I was over that, but apparently I'm not. Maybe it's because he's a Pisces and I have terrible luck when it comes to Pisces. I mean, I'm always falling for them, but they always have interests elsewhere.<br />
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(*=not actual name)Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-78776571649404312912009-10-25T14:26:00.001-04:002009-10-25T14:26:37.836-04:00Meet the Alter Ego...<div>I honestly think that if I was to construct my alter ego, giver her a name, create for her an identity, that she would heave the name of Nicki Daniels, seeing as my actual name is something else.<br />
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</div><div>Of course Nicki Daniels sounds quite normal, but I always imagined her being a bit hardcore with a name designed to fool the best of us. I imagine her having a very seductive personality, not afraid to show off who she is, but somehow being classy about it and she's also a downright bitch. She's into the eccentrics and drawn to things that the average person would be skeptical about being drawn to until it becomes a pop cult item.<br />
</div><div>Of course she wouldn't be dressed in spandex and leather or where atrocious wigs of varying styles and colors. Nothing about her would even scream hoodrat. There would an allure about her that is difficult to escape from and in a way, she's a bit mysterious. She's also very daring.<br />
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</div><div>To be completely honest, maybe that's who I should be be for Halloween, my alter ego.<br />
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</div><div><img src="http://www.blackcelebkids.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/singer-monica.jpg" /><br />
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</div><div>And I just liked this picture of Monica and her son and all these different types of personalities/egos represented.<br />
</div>Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6728030031132386854.post-71710595870399396732009-10-25T14:04:00.001-04:002009-10-25T14:04:39.139-04:00A New Day and A Returning Frustration...So I get off venting on one topic and have to start venting on another. THE DAMN BOYS LIVING DOWNSTAIRS!!!!<br />
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They stay banging on their ceiling telling us to be quiet, yet we barely make any noise and they do it at the most obscene times, like when we're not doing anything that is making us walk across the floor or just playing our music. I'm just bout ready to go down there and let loose.<br />
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My emotions are all over the place today and right now, I don't need any sort of frustrations like the one they are about to give me.Nicki Danielshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07198349717154102982noreply@blogger.com0